Common Responses to the Question, “How can I keep deer out of my garden?”

• You can’t
• Buy red lights that imitate predator’s eyes and deer will back slowly away
• Line the outside of the garden with human hair. This sounds gross and like a thing I don’t want to do.
• Ha ha ha
• Tack silver pie plates around the fence and it’ll scare the deer off.
• Forget about the deer, what about the rabbits, birds, and ground-hogs?
• Good luck

I live in the county with the highest incidence of Lyme disease in the country. That’s a lot of ticks. I was talking to Aunt T and Uncle G and they had four ticks on them in the last week between the two of them. This has resulted in a slightly over-cautious attitude which manifests itself like this:

Sister: Alex, do I have any ticks on me?

Me: You just walked from the car to the house. You were only outside for thirty seconds.

Sister: ARE THERE ANY TICKS?*

Anyway, the moral of the story is that I need a fence. I told one guy I was going to make it six feet high, and he told me deer can jump a fence twice that height. I got to thinking about what would happen if I went outside one morning and there was a deer trapped in my garden behind the fence. I figured I’d ask Sister to film me as I went out to scare it away, and then depending on how that turned out I would either have good footage for my blog or get featured on America’s Funniest Home Videos.

Also, I would have her do a thorough Tick Check™.

 

 

*I am only slightly exaggerating

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